Devotions Through Divorce ~ Week 4

I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses.  Now choose life, so that you and your children may live. ~Dueteronomy 30:19

One of the hardest things during my season of divorce was learning how to fill the time when my children were not with me. I have never been one to fear alone time and I love spending time with friends. However, the circumstances and anxiety surrounding my situation created a feeling of needing to protect my children. I remember the aching pain I experienced the first night they were away from home and I know so many of you can relate. I counted the minutes until they were back home. I knew I needed an intentional plan for every other weekend that would benefit me as well as my children.

I decided to spend the weekends they were away practicing what I like to call extreme self-care and readying the house for their return. My goal was to have my boys walk back through the doors of our house and by greeted by a momma with a full heart and a full pantry.

I would pray for my boys all weekend, but specifically when they left and right before their return. I would literally tell God that I knew they were His children first and that I knew he would protect and keep them until they returned home. This brought peace to my heart. I would then spend the weekend doing things I loved: reading, watching TV, napping, shopping, getting massages, getting my nails done, spending time with friends, working out...anything that brought me joy. I would also do the grocery shopping, laundry and cleaning so that everything was in order when they returned. I had a Sunday meal ready for them when they came home and welcomed them refreshed and rested.

In the beginning, I had to force myself to do these activities rather than sit at home and worry about them. Children pick up on our attitudes and can sense anxiety. Being intentional about setting a tone of rest, renewal and peace helps them adjust to changing schedules. One of the best gifts you can give your children during this uncertain time is to give them something that they can depend on to be routine and predictable.

Devotions Through Divorce ~ Week 3

Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own.~Matthew 6:34

I am a gifted worrier.  If worrying were an Olympic sport, I’d take the gold.  There I would be, standing on the platform, wearing the gold medal around my neck with the Star Spangled Banner playing proudly for all to hear and worrying that I would fall off the platform before the song was over.

During my season of divorce, worrying became my second full-time job. There were so many things outside of my control and so much uncertainty. However, the more time I spent talking to God, the more I realized that life is always out of control and uncertain. The only certainty in life is that God will equip us with what we need as our needs arise. Worrying does not speed up this process, it only blocks the blessings from our eyes.

I have cultivated a habit of praying when I begin to worry. Given my proclivity toward worrying, this proves very helpful for my prayer life! Pray more, worry less. Actively take care of what you can today and leave the rest to God.

Devotions Through Divorce~Week 2

The prudent see danger and seek refuge, but the simple keep going and suffer for it. ~Proverbs 27:12

When we find ourselves in a space where our marriage is crumbling and the life we are trying to cling to is slipping from our grasp, it is often our nature to feel the need to keep powering through on our own. There are times, however, when we need to see the danger for what it is, and find shelter from the storm. During a divorce, you are not seeking shelter to wait out the storm, but, rather, seeking shelter as a place to plan your steps after the storm has passed.

God is always waiting with open arms for us to fall into and rest. There we will find peace that surpasses all understanding.

This week, identify your safe havens; spaces, people, situations that make you feel loved and cared for. Find rest in God's word and let his promises pour over you and protect you from the storm that will eventually pass.

Devotions Through Divorce~Week 1

"For I know the plans I have for you”, declares the Lord, “plans to help you not to hurt you, plans to give you hope and a future.” ~Jeremiah 14:11

This season of your life will be life changing and life giving.  That’s not my promise, that’s God’s.  When our worldly husband steps out, God steps in.  He promises that His plan is sovereign and we need to trust in Him.  Our work lies in learning to trust our heavenly father when our trust in others has often been the source of such pain.

During the year after my divorce, I focused completely on getting my household in order, beginning with refocusing my relationship with God.  By putting that relationship first, I was able to find calm in the storm.  I learned to trust, lean, and let go by clinging to His word when I felt all else was slipping away.

God’s plans are infinitely better than ours, but we must lay our plans down daily so that His can come forth.  God’s promises do not disappoint.  Trust, lean, and move forward; there is much hope in a future held by the hands of God.

This week, set your intentions for your family. What do you want your home, family, life to look like? Even if it seems so far out of reach, you must know where you are headed before you begin your journey. Then pray over these intentions and ask God his will for your life.

Devotions Through Divorce~Introduction

For everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven. ~Ephesians 3:1

I have been fortunate to always live where I am able to experience all four seasons this world has to offer.  Although each season has its pros and cons, there are some we would rather skip altogether.  Regardless, each must be experienced and there is beauty to be found even in the most undesirable conditions.

I believe that God organized the seasons as an outward representation of the seasons of our lives.   Part of my story includes the season of divorce.  I made a promise to God that if he helped me walk through that overwhelming time, I would share what I learned and encourage other women who were having to do the same.  If you too are experiencing this season, I would like to offer words of encouragement to bolster your spirit during this time.  While I am not a Bible expert, I do believe devotions are one of the most powerful ways to set your intention and focus your days.  I have walked through the season of divorce, made it to the other side, and the view from here is amazing.  Join me and be encouraged.  God has so much more in store for your life.

This blog series will be divided into four seasons, beginning with fall, with one devotion for each week of the year.  It is my hope that each devotion and accompanying scripture allow you to pause, reflect and pray.  I also recommend journaling during this time of your life as a way to see your progress and where God is answering prayers and performing miracles.

While you read, pray and journal, know that I am praying for the sunshine to return to your life.